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November 2, 2012
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"This has, been said, so many times that I'm not sure if matters. But we never stood a chance and I'm not sure if mattered~"

A young girl is crying, hugging her phone, a pillow. All along with listening to her favorite band. A normal teen? Right after a brake up and having low grades? I'd think not. A young girl that has gone threw so much she doesn't know who she is and all she wants is attention she can control.

So what does she do? She begins trying to find herself. Months of therapy, months of intense self beatings mentally trying to change her new found self within this rebellion. All to no avail.

So what does she do know? Goes against what she stood for, she begins bully hern bully's, Ignores the facts, becomes rude, then she begins to cut and try suicide.
She still isn't getting anymore attention, But in fact even less now.

Her best friend, the gay, everyone's dream friend. He gets it all. He's beautiful, skinny, smart, talented, everyone loves him and not her. She begins trying to get him to be nicer, but they are so close they are like siblings. The girl hates all her siblings thou, they where always better then her, and still are. What is she to do.

Pretend everything is fine, back to normal with her ADD and other fragile mental states, but on the inside is the true turmoil she doesn't let show, only to her online friend she really doesn't know.

Everyone still thinks shes the same, now they're getting bored of her.

Throughout her life she has been ignored, mentally beaten to the point she doesn't care if you mistreat her. Years of being the last at everything, never being good enough for anyone. Years of abuse from those horrid children and step parents. Recovery is a long way away for her.

"I'm good enough!" She screams into she pillow and begins beating her walls "Am I not good enough!?" she screams falling to the floor in tears,"I'm not good enough... I have no purpose... I'm useless..." She whispers into her hands and then picks her dog up and begins sobbing heavily into the animals fur.

"I should do them all the favor..." She whispers and begins looking for her knife. It to dull for her liking so she goes to the kitchen and looks for a butcher knife. Goes back to her room and begins cutting. The pain is so much, blood begins to tickle from her legs onto the bed sheets.

She calls her friend hoping he'll show some light that she is still loved. He's in a horrid mood and doesn't help. Just pushes her over the edge. She curses at him and throws the turned off phone against a wall shattering it. Grabbing the knife she thinks quick befor the rage is gone and shoves it deep into the throat, then begins dragging it down to her chest revealing the insides of her.

Dropping the knife and fainting from pain into the bed, she dies within seconds to minutes from bleeding.

Know she'll never know if her love would've been given back.
Quick suicide writing half from me, half from nothing =) I hope you enjoy at least a bit .
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:iconimadorkofcourse:
Imadorkofcourse Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012
wow. (that's a good wow)
and in my honest opinion, teen suicide has become way overexposed to the point that its not treated like a big deal anymore, which is incredibly stupid because last time a check, when i person ends their life it's kinda a big deal. And then every single time some teen commits suicide there's OD sympathy, like Amanda Todd, yeah its sad, she was young and i don't want to sound like a horrible person, but she showed her boobs off to strangers she met online, and slept with a guy who was a in relationship, there are soooo many teens who deal with worse stuff, and have zero control, and they don't make the news. And i don't really know what I'm getting at other than there is a MAJOR problem here...... and its midnight and im exhausted so *end rant*
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:iconaccestoeverthing:
AccesToEverthing Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Student Writer
Thank you for your feedback an if its pet exposed isn't my writing this over exposing it as well? I can completely relate with the Amanda Todd situation. I think it's stupid
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:iconlovefreak413:
LoveFreak413 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Student Writer
I like it but there are many spelling mistakes.
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:iconaccestoeverthing:
AccesToEverthing Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Student Writer
I wrote it extremly quickly without editing, I'm going to fix it when I get home tonight
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:iconlovefreak413:
LoveFreak413 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Student Writer
Alright cool I look forward to seeing what you do.
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:iconaccestoeverthing:
AccesToEverthing Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Student Writer
^^
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:iconx12-1992:
X12-1992 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
This is why depression should be taken very seriously. I dont care if the direct cause of the suicide is something stupid, there is ALWAYS a bigger picture. GReat poem.
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:iconaccestoeverthing:
AccesToEverthing Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Student Writer
Thank you very much for reading and sending your feed back to me. You are correct and I wish people would be able to understand without having to go through it first.
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:iconx12-1992:
X12-1992 Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
I really hate people who do this "an hero" stuff and mock suicides of teens. Like, there was this boy who apparently killed himself over a video game. Maybe it was just that, if so, why waste your time making fun of a loser like him and giving his family pain. But maybe it was more, and that video game was the final straw, so if thats true....then dont insult the dead, asshole.
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:iconaccestoeverthing:
AccesToEverthing Featured By Owner Nov 3, 2012  Student Writer
I can relate. what if he was truly hurting form years of mental abuse and always being second and the video is what pushed him over the edge
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