"This has, been said, so many times that I'm not sure if matters. But we never stood a chance and I'm not sure if mattered~"
A young girl is crying, hugging her phone, a pillow. All along with listening to her favorite band. A normal teen? Right after a brake up and having low grades? I'd think not. A young girl that has gone threw so much she doesn't know who she is and all she wants is attention she can control.
So what does she do? She begins trying to find herself. Months of therapy, months of intense self beatings mentally trying to change her new found self within this rebellion. All to no avail.
So what does she do know? Goes against what she stood for, she begins bully hern bully's, Ignores the facts, becomes rude, then she begins to cut and try suicide.
She still isn't getting anymore attention, But in fact even less now.
Her best friend, the gay, everyone's dream friend. He gets it all. He's beautiful, skinny, smart, talented, everyone loves him and not her. She begins trying to get him to be nicer, but they are so close they are like siblings. The girl hates all her siblings thou, they where always better then her, and still are. What is she to do.
Pretend everything is fine, back to normal with her ADD and other fragile mental states, but on the inside is the true turmoil she doesn't let show, only to her online friend she really doesn't know.
Everyone still thinks shes the same, now they're getting bored of her.
Throughout her life she has been ignored, mentally beaten to the point she doesn't care if you mistreat her. Years of being the last at everything, never being good enough for anyone. Years of abuse from those horrid children and step parents. Recovery is a long way away for her.
"I'm good enough!" She screams into she pillow and begins beating her walls "Am I not good enough!?" she screams falling to the floor in tears,"I'm not good enough... I have no purpose... I'm useless..." She whispers into her hands and then picks her dog up and begins sobbing heavily into the animals fur.
"I should do them all the favor..." She whispers and begins looking for her knife. It to dull for her liking so she goes to the kitchen and looks for a butcher knife. Goes back to her room and begins cutting. The pain is so much, blood begins to tickle from her legs onto the bed sheets.
She calls her friend hoping he'll show some light that she is still loved. He's in a horrid mood and doesn't help. Just pushes her over the edge. She curses at him and throws the turned off phone against a wall shattering it. Grabbing the knife she thinks quick befor the rage is gone and shoves it deep into the throat, then begins dragging it down to her chest revealing the insides of her.
Dropping the knife and fainting from pain into the bed, she dies within seconds to minutes from bleeding.
Know she'll never know if her love would've been given back.